Dating
      Violence
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Last
      year
      I
      was
      going
      out
      with
      a
      guy
      who
      I
      really
     
     
      cared
      for.
      Unfortunately
      the
      relationship
      was
      a
      ‘‘vio-
     
     
      lent’’
      one
      where
      when
      ever
      he
      was
      drinking.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      He
      never
      really
      hitme.
      He
      slammed
      me
      against
      the
     
     
      car
      and
      hit
      me
      with
      objects
      like
      his
      hat
      in
      the
      face
     
     
      which
      stung
      alittle.
      He
      was
      always
      so
      controlling,
      I
     
     
      had
      to
      call
      him
      all
      the
      time
      and
      he
      would
      get
      mad
      if
      I
     
     
      was
      late.
      I
      was
      no
      longer
      allowed
      to
      hang
      around
     
     
      with
      my
      friends.
      When
      I
      was
      with
      then
      it
      always
     
     
      ended
      with
      him
      and
      I
      fighting.
      I
      really
      thought
      I
     
     
      loved
      him
      he
      loved
      me
      I
      never
      saw
      my
      the
      relation-
     
     
      ship
      as
      violent
      even
      though
      my
      friends
      said
      so.
      Not
     
     
      until
      he
      tried
      to
      rape
      me.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Our
      relationship
      was
      probably
      about
      to
      end
      before
     
     
      this
      happened
      but
      it
      just
      pushed
      things
      along.
      He
     
     
      knew
      how
      I
      hated
      going
      fast
      in
      cars
      and
      one
      night
      he
     
     
      wanted
      to
      have
      sex
      I
      said
      no,
      he
      started
      to
      drive
     
     
      before
      I
      could
      get
      out
      of
      the
      car.
      He
      was
      driving
      fast
     
     
      around
      corners
      without
      slowing
      down
      and
      yelling
      for
     
     
      me
      to
      take
      my
      shirt
      off.
      I
      was
      crying
      and
      screaming
     
     
      for
      him
      to
      stop,
      I
      was
      yelling
      telling
      him
      no
      I
      wasn’t
     
     
      taking
      my
      shirt
      off
      finally
      he
      took
      me
      home.
      We
     
     
      broke
      up
      shortly
      after.
      I
      tried
      to
      remain
      friends
     
     
      though.
      We
      talked
      and
      called
      each
      other
      once
      and
     
     
      awhile
      even
      when
      I
      started
      going
      out
      with
      someone
     
     
      else.
      One
      night
      when
      we
      were
      both
      working
      the
      late
     
     
      shift
      and
      it
      was
      raining
      he
      asked
      me
      if
      I
      wanted
      a
     
     
      drive
      home,
      because
      we
      had
      been
      broken
      up
      a
      while
     
     
      and
      I
      was
      dating
      someone
      else
      I
      didn’t
      think
      anything
     
     
      of
      it
      and
      accepted
      the
      drive.
      When
      we
      were
      going
     
     
      home
      he
      asked
      if
      I
      wanted
      to
      stop
      to
      get
      something
      to
     
     
      eat
      l
      agreed
      so
      we
      went
      through
      a
      drive
      thru
      and
      went
     
     
      to
      park
      the
      car
      somewhere.
      After
      we
      were
      done
      eating
     
     
      he
      started
      talking,
      could
      we
      get
      back
      together?
      I
      said
     
     
      no!
      Thejnext
      thing
      I
      knew,
      he
      was
      on
      top
      of
      me
     
     
      trying
      a
      second
      time
      to
      rape
      me
      I
      screamed
      and
      fought
     
     
      finally
      he
      got
      up
      and
      took
      me
      home.
      I
      never
      told
     
     
      anyone
      about
      this
      second
      incident.
     
    
   
   
    
     
        
     
     
        
     
     
        
     
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      [know
      he
      now
      has
      another
      girlfriend,
      I
      hope
      for
     
    

    
     
      hersake
      he
      has
      changed.
      If
      he
      hasn’tI
      hope
      she
      reads
     
     
      this
      and
      ends
      the
      relationship
      before
      she
      goes
      through
     
     
      what
      I
      did.
      I
      hope
      he
      reads
      this
      so
      he
      knows
      what
      he
     
    
   
   
    
     
      1
      ,
     
     
      |
      heeadacbeahed
     
    
   
   
    
     
      HOPE
     
    
   
   
    
     
      After
      you
      raised
      your
      voice
      to
      me,
     
     
      Then
      your
      hand,
     
     
      Then
      your
      fist,
     
     
      I
      lost
      respect
     
    

    
     
      For
      you,
     
    

    
     
      For
      myself,
     
    

    
     
      For
      us
      ...
      what
      we
      once
      were
     
     
      And
      never
      will
      be
      again.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Reprinted
      with
      permission
      of
      Tearmann
      House
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Self
      Defense
      (Rape
      Awareness)
     
     
      Course,
      by
      Ron
      Fagen
      of
      Dartmouth,
     
    
   
   
    
     
      N.S.
      will
      be
      offered
      within
      the
      next
      few
      weeks
      to
      all
     
     
      females
      of
      the
      UPEI
      community.
      It
      will
      consist
      if
     
     
      mental
      and
      physical
      defense
      preparation.
      Any
      in-
     
     
      quires
      can
      be
      made
      at
      the
      UPEI
      S.U.
      (The
      Barn)
     
     
      566-0530.
      It
      will
      cost
      $15
      per
      person.
      It
      is
      abouta
      3
     
     
      hour
      session.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Prince
      Edward
      Island
      Rape/Sexual
      Assault
      Centre
     
    
   
   
    
     
      566-8999
     
    

    
     
      Anderson
      House
      892-0960
     
     
      Hospital
      566-6200
      |
     
    

    
     
      Ambulance
      892-5311
     
     
      Police
      (city)
      368-2677
     
     
      RCMP
      566-7100
     
     
      '
      Security
      (UPEI)
      566-0384
     
     
      566-0373
     
     
      Health
      Centre
      566-0616
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      UPEI
      X-P
      RESS
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      October
      24,
      1991
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Page
      19