By Stephan MacLeod

FACT: It takes a sperm one hour to swim seven inches. OPINION: I'd hate to use the swimming pool after a sperm.

FACT: The initial spurt of ejac- ulate travels at 28 miles per hour. By way of comparison, the world record for the 100 yard dash is 27.1 miles per hour.

OPINION: I'm sure people would pay money to see a race between the world's fastest man, and an initial spurt of ejaculation.

FACT: Honking of car horns for a couple that just got married is an old superstition to insure great sex.

OPINION: Next time someone cuts you off in traffic, don't honk your horn at them. Just have sex with their wife.

FACT : The most successful X- rated movie of all time is 'Deep Throat’. It cost less than $25,000 to make it and has earned more than $600 million dollars.

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OPINION: You can make a lot of money with X-rated movies. You just have to get over that

fear of dogs.

FACT: Egyptians inserted stones into their vagina to pre- vent pregnancy. (It worked kind of like the modern |UD by pre- venting implantation). OPINION: Well that explains why the Egyptians walked so funny.

FACT: In Medieval France unfaithful wives were made to chase a chicken through town while naked.

OPINION: Now a days the French deal with adultery ina court of law, where the unfaith- ful wife chases a chicken while naked.

FACT: Napoleon's penis was sold to an American Hrolaget for $40,000.

OPINION: They didn't call him Bonaparte for nothing.

FACT: Seventy percent of women would rather have chocolate than sex. (Poll taken in a 1995 popular women's magazine).

OPINION: If someone came up on the street and asked me if I'd prefer chocolate or sex, it

would all depend on how much -

money | had.

FACT: The same chemical responsible for the ecstatic highs of love and sexual attrac- tion, phenylethylamine, is also found in chocolate.

OPINION: Hence the tradition of giving a box of chocolates and a syringe of phenylethy- lamine to a loved one.

FACT: Oneirogmophobia is the fear of wet dreams.

OPINION: There's nothing more embarrassing than wak- ing up in a wet bed, except maybe waking up in an aquari- um.

FACT: The male fetus is capa- ble of attaining an erection dur- ing the last trimester. OPINION: "Aw isn't that cute? He's kicking again...wait that's not his foot..oh god."

FACT: A survey conducted by Masters and Johnson in the early 1980s revealed that the third-most frequent fantasy amongst both homosexual men and women was a heterosexu- al encounter.

OPINION: My third most fre- quent fantasy is meeting Dolly Parton.

FACT: According to the Kinsey Institute, half of the men raised on farms have had a sexual encounter with an animal. OPINION: Does that include men raised at fish farms?

FACT: The word "sex" was coined in 1382.

OPINION: Before 1382, humans didn't need physical contact. They'd spawn in pairs or in groups. Males and females released milt and eggs into the water at the same time. These were mixed together and the eggs were fertilized. The fertilized eggs floated away in the current or sunk to the bottom, where they lay with the substrate. There was no parental care given, so large amounts of eggs were produced.