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Greenpeace Soup Ingraients:

1 member of Greenpeace Foundation - diced

' 1 green pepper, minced

1 slightly bludgeoned baby seal pup - skinned and marinated in NFLD screech.

l canister green dye

salt and pepper

Fry up diced Green- peace n‘enber and seal pup and pur in canister of green dye and two quart's screech and bring to boil. Sinner for sixtv minutes and season to taste. Serves six hungry seal hunters. (For best results, stir with bloody seal—hunting club). ’ Brigitte Burgers Ingredients: '

. Mamary glands of two female seals about to give birth .

two freshly skinned seal pups — finely chopped v 1 garlic bulb minced paprika salt and pepper Form in to patties and fry at 350°.) Serves three. Seal Skinning Six to twenty day old ' seals are preferred because they are quite gamey in flavor. _ 'Ib skin, don thick gloves and make sure teh seal is at least. moonscigulsg If u off until it ' " is. Next, make a small cut from the middle of the back flipper to its rectum. TEar the skin away until you able to grab the back flippers with your hands while - '- stepping on the flap _ of skin with your boot. Now pull the skin with from the carcass the same as for rabbits, strapping only to cut away tough

THE

, and would thus like to

pass on to your readers my own personal utilizations of these seals — one of the nations vast untapped resources. For instance, the flippers make great duste'rs, and door stops and, as a building material, indeed, I have been using them for chinking leaks and holes in my walls and roof for years. Seals also make great bottle openers (if they are small enough), as well as terrific decorations around Christmas time. Baby seals are good as an in the wash fabric softener. So there you have it. Use your own imagination and there is no telling what you might come up with.” Yours truely, U.R.Kuntz Ministry of Seal Resources

ENGINEERS ’

' .

:m mum

Once an Engineer Always an Engineer

A very capable but rather naive engineer and been working at a

' mine location in Northern

Ontario for six months when he received word that his wife in Toronto had made him the proud father of a healthy son. He obtained a Weekend leave and left as soon as he could to meet his wife and first born child. ‘l'IUpon reaching the hospital he spoke briefly with his wife, and upon ’ discovering she was in fine health, proceeded

\to be escorted by a nurse

into an adjoining roan where he could met his son. His initial reaction was one of shock as he asked the nurse, "Why does the. little fellow have a band-aid on his penis?"

to which she replied, "There is nothing to fear.

spots until the seal is totally skinned. If using only for the skin,- chuch the carcass far enough away so as not to make you sick, otherwise gut the carcass and pack it away.

I Saturday, March 13, 1982 Officer's Club at 1:00 p.m. Free pizza Meet the Professional Engineers. All engineering student welcome.

of something we do here called circumcision. We gave him a spoonful of rum before so that he felt no pain." The engineer replied, "But why is he starting to. cry now? "- and she responded, "He's just hungry, and I am about to nurse him to relieve him of that problem. " Satisfied, the engineer returned to the work site, where he was inmediately confronted by his buddies. "How are the wife and Son?" they inquired. "My wife's fine, and my son, well, he's a typical He's lying up there the hospital on his back, with a belly full of unit, 'a tit in his mouth, and a sore penis." Medical News

After years of

research, scientists of the biology and chemistry

B'I-WE'EKLY'

He replied,

profession have finally figured out what makes engineers. superior .to - the average person. The v roots of it start intheir sperm. That's right,‘ their sperm. - Because of the quality of this sperm, scientists have given it a new name- They say that every nomal male has one superm for every thousand regulars‘perm, and every male engineer has just the opposite,-

~one regular sperm for

every thousand superm.

It has also been noted " that superm is an excellent dietary source of protein.

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fax".

Here at "View From the Top" we normally a'

, policy of not making fun

of Freshman. You can't, ': blame most of them for , being stupid becauSe so would be kicking your om dog because he can't read; However, due to quite a few requests and a reviewing of this case, We make an exception in presenting this week's Geek Of the Week. '

Letter to the Editor: Dear Mr. Snord,

Upon hearing of your plans to run the Canadian Seal Hunt as a feature article, I was delighted

SCAVENGER HUNT "

For B.A. Students after the Smoker Saturday. mules only!

Hand grenades and small nuclear devices not permitted. Prizes awarded.

VIENFan. THE Tags" ,QEEK ofi'thevxlEEK

Gordon Steward . lst year arts student.