Marcu 23, 2005

THE CADRE e 4

OPINION & CO

Conflict of Interests

Will Cooper News Editor

Recently in the news, we heard Newfoundland Premier Danny Williams and Alan Doyle of Great Big Sea talk about former Beatle Paul McCartney and his wife Linda’s coming here to protest the Canadian seal hunt. It seemed to be the Newfoundlanders’ intention to show that the McCartneys had been misinformed not only about the seal hunt, but that they had their heads so high in the clouds that they couldn’t tell their asses from their elbows. The fact that they so played-up the McCartneys’ supposed confusion over

which province the ice-flow they were -

on belonged to is a pretty clear indication of this intention. Unfortunately, the real issue at hand, the issue that inspired the McCartneys to come all the way over here from England, was totally overlooked: Cruelty. The question of whether or

not the seal hunt should be allowed to continue is a moral one. It has little to do with how strong the seal population is, or how many days old the pups are when they are killed. The real question that should have been addressed is whether or not it is cruel to kill animals without the necessity of doing so.

Of course, the Newfoundlanders can be excused for not knowing this. After all, it was the McCartneys — aware that they would be viewed as hysterical, wishy-washy animal lovers — who failed to say so.

“If the McCartney’s had their way we’d shut down every slaughter house in the world,’ said Williams. And he was right. It’s just too bad they didn’t have the guts to just come out and say so. They might have had a stronger case.

The United States of Hypocrisy

Will Cooper News Editor

According to William E. Odom, a retired Lieutenant General of the US Army who served as the Director of the National Security Agency for President Ronald Reagan, pestering Iran about non-proliferation (i.e. nuclear ambitions) serves the opposite of its intended effect.

“More than anything, it is uniting the Iranian people,” he says. And why shouldn’t they feel this way? How does it make any sense that a country with more nuclear weapons than any other is dictating who can or can’t have nuclear weapons. America and Russia between them possess 97% of the world’s nuclear weapons. Other countries, like China, India, and Pakistan, also have nuclear weapons

and are no more politically stable or responsible than Iran. Yet they are not getting any such grief.

“The message being sent around the world,” says Odom, “is that if you get a nuclear weapon, the US will stop hounding you.”

If the United States wants to

play world police and have a say in

what other countries are not allowed to do, what sort of weapons they are not allowed to possess, first it should set an example and observe these rules on its home turf. Weapons of mass destruction should be outlawed worldwide — including, perhaps starting with, the United States.

“You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war.” — Albert Einstein

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Spring Break 2?

Pete Grandy Reporter

With a faculty strike forémost in students’ heads, we begin to realize free time may be on the horizon. The strike will lead.to a joyous celebration for some students and a miserable roadblock for others. Curious as a cat, I wondered how students planned on spending their free time, bearing in mind the strike would take place. So I hit the campus to poll 100 students on their contingency plans. To my stupefaction, I received a wide variety of responses. Many of them are a

touch vague so, for clarity, I took the -

liberty to interpret them for you.

16% - Study, work on projects and assignments, etc.

Interpretation: Some of the students . who gave me this answer were probably

concerned that I would use their name and wanted to exhibit diligence (ie: full of shit). The others are just lame.

| 16% - Get Drunk

Interpretation: The adored past time of many students. In fact, students choose this particular activity for occasions other than labor disputes. To name a few: doing well on a test, doing poorly on a test, Friday, Saturday, storm day, payday, birthday, holiday, the sporadic Wednesday, Thursday or Sunday, and anytime alcohol is free. One participant was specific and said he was getting drunk with grade 10 girls. The disturbing part is that grade 10 girls willing to get drunk on a weekday would most likely be willing to do more than just get sloshed. Good luck with that buddy.

9% - Do nothing

Interpretation: These students are the most honest and realistic amongst those I have asked. Doing nothing can be defined as contributing nothing to society or your self-betterment. Whether it be listening to the album “One way ticket to hell and back.” by The Darkness or breaking out the old

Lite-Brite and creating luminous

genitals, the activity you perform is completely and utterly useless.

7% - Play Uni-ball

Interpretation: This is an online computer game that resembles hockey except instead of sticks and skates, the players’ fly around in jet-powered spaceships. These students were polled in CASS and currently study engineering and math. Will this game replace our national sport? Keep dreaming dorks.

5% - Sleep No interpretation required

5% - Touch Myself

Interpretation: I’m pleased to see that self-gratification is in line with sleep. These people clearly have their priorities straight.

Honorable mentions - These people didn’t share the same goals with anyone, yet remain noteworthy: -Workout a lot (Cutter)

-Sell Hot Dogs

-Go to Brazil and hit on the girls in the Bavaria commercials. (Perhaps a little too ambitious)

-Sell Drugs

-Buy Drugs

-Play poker online/weep

-Stop showering in protest of the strike -Dick off

-Party like it’s 1999 (Will Smith fan #1)

-Song Writing Circle with Professors -Picket

-Vandalize security van

Thank you to those who participated in my survey. (Note: There is no way of knowing whether the professors will cross the picket line as I write this article. If they reach a deal before Tuesday morning, I apologize for getting your hopes up, particularly to the individual who plans on dicking off.) -