—meZ-

By Kaberi Dasgupta

Psst! Watch out: Here comes the enemy.

Well, the fortress of the enemy. The remains of the

fortress of the enemy. Red, watery swollen eyes. Bulging, blistered nose.

Mouth full of cough lozenges. He trudges on, leaving a trail of Kleenex behind him.

This would not happen to me this winter. I had suffered

for too many years.

This year I would defeat the enemy.

Vitamins every morning. Ten glasses of organge juice per day. Exercise ﬁve times every week.

Sweaters, scarves, coats, gloves, three pair of socks, stockings. A

Chicken soup.

Stream baths.

January came to an end. 1’30 degree temperature. I

NOpTON

jewellercg ltd.

We repairall types of jewellery. ' Q‘uality instore service. Trophies, plaques,

and engraving also available. NODTONCg

jewellcrcg ltd.

Coahdorcﬂon Ctr" Moll

4

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could still breathe! I could

speak. My choir director was astounded. My mother

stopped buying cases of Triamini'c. People were will-

ing to look directly at me,

without covering their mouths and noses when I spoke to them.

After years of struggle, I

had ﬁnally conquered Prince ,

Fresh Point of View... winter version ‘

Edward Island winters.

Then one day, when the temperature hovered around 0°C, I did the unthinkable.

I did not wear a hat.

May, ‘Feﬁriii‘y E1! ’

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ghsnyg‘

The enemy had been wait- ing for this moment ...

Until June, writing may be my only means of com- munications.

Tale of the Duck; or, hOWt’he normal curve [originated

By The Duck

Once upon a time in a kingdom that was not far away from McDonald’s Restuarant on University

Avenue there lived a duck who never went to Church.

The duck was green with a long red neck and two eyes that could only be described

Degree applications

All students, full-time and part-time, who expect to;

graduate in May, ' 1985, are reminded that they must make application for a certiﬁcate, diploma, or degree.

Application forms are avdilable at the Registrar’s Ofﬁce and must be completed by Friday, 15 March. The graduation fee must be paid by Tuesday, 16 April, as follows:

Certificate or Diploma ~

Degree

$10 $45

Tax deduction forms

The Education Deduction forms (T2202A), which allow full-time students a deduction of $50 per month for the 1984 tax return, are available in the Registrar’s Office, Kelley

Building .

Tuition receipt forms are also available in the Business Ofﬁce for all fulLtime and part-time students. Please pick up the above forms as soon as possible.

. as missing. »

The duck in all his wealth could actually fly ﬁrst class South for the winter, and so one day he left the kingdom

4 and this story.

Many years later, as a matter a fact it was yesterday,

the duck returned to ﬁnd that -

the once-beautiful kingdom had changed to an institute of higher learning. ‘

This upset the duck be- cause he didn’t think that higher learning was needed since, after all, he was only aduck.

So the duck, using all of his duckly powers, went about changing the goals of the institution.

First the duck put lounges all over the campus to make all the rulers relax and not notice all the coming changes that they would have gotten upset over if they weren’T RELAXED.

They, by using hypnosis, he made all the Profs use a deviant practice called THE NORMAL CURVE to mark all papers and tests.

The duck then let the stu- dents of the once mighty institution know that if every- one scored low on every paper and exam under the system ‘of THE' NORMAL CURVE,’ everyone would actually get a good mark.

The duck was again ruler of the kingdom in just a few short decades, since other smart ducks all over the universe had also performed the same trick on the institu- tionsof higher learning in

their kingdom too.

Soon the smart ducks were the only creatures smart enough to rule anything. The moral of this story is that you should give'a heck about your education but don’t give a heck about a duck. '

- y . . . . . . y . . - . . . . . . . v . . . . . . -

.r

Of the Fiéld and Stream Club “WHERE THERE ARE NO STRANGERS, ONLY FRIENDS YOU HAVEN'T MET”

ONEOF CHARLOTTETOWN’S