Fact & Opinion

moking women have more lovers than non-smoking women. OPINION: Guys like to sleep with women who smoke because chicks with yellow teeth remind them of their grandmothers.

FACT: 80 percent of men report that they orgasm during their sex dreams. OPINION: My sex dreams usually involve a farm, a dozen naughty little sheep, and a night spent in a jail cell. No wait, that wasn't a dream. That was last summer in Souris.

FACT: 1 million condoms are sold daily in the US.

OPINION: You should practice safe sex in order to avoid STD's. And hav- ing anal sex with junkies in an alley way doesn't help either.

FACT: 9% of women regularly mas- turbate while their partner watches. OPINION: You can learn about what turns your partner on by watch- ing them masturbate. But watching complete strangers masturbate can get you arrested, if they catch you hiding in the closet.

FACT: According to Playboy, litera- ture is the most common sexual aid. OPINION: Of course Playboy would say literature is the most common sexual aid. That's like Oprah's maga- zine saying Oprah is person most guys fantasize about in bed.

FACT: Everyday, 200 million cou- ples around the world have sex, which is about over 2000 couples at any given moment.

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‘with you give her some eggs.

OPINION: You'd think with all these people having sex all the time, people would be less uptight when I masturbate in movie theaters.

FACT: Women are most likely to want to have sex when they are ovu- lating. . OPINION: Forget spanish fly, and alcohol, if you want a woman to sleep

FACT: It was during the Victorian era that the formerly nude Cupid was redesigned as wearing a skirt. OPINION: The Victorians were so into cross-dressing that they once put Santa Clause in a wedding gown.

FACT: 30% of women over the age of 80 still have sexual intercourse either with their spouse or : boyfriends.

OPINION: If you want to sleep with an 80 year old, you're going to have to wait until either their spouse or boyfriend dies. ©

FACT: Fellatio ranks as the number one sexual act desired by heterosexu- al men.

OPINION: That's why it should be a compliment when you call someone a cocksucker.

FACT: Mosquitoes, which mate in the air perform a sex act that lasts only 2 seconds.

OPINION: The way I have sex is very similar to a mosquito. Except for the whole mating in the air thing.

FACT: Women with a Ph.D. are twice as likely to be interested ina _ one-night stand than those with only a Bachelor's degree.

OPINION: When you spend as - much money on your education as someone with a Ph. D. chances are you're so used to getting fucked by high tuition, campus bookstores, and student unions that a one-night stand won't make much of a differ- ence.

FACT: Australian women have sex on the first date more than women the same age in the USA and Canada. OPINION: God wanted Jesus to be an Australian, but he couldn't find three wise men or a virgin...and the place smells like kangaroo shit. —