Marcu 23, 2005

Right Here and Now

Rob Walker Copy Editor

I sit here writing this on Sunday afternoon and since things are still up in the air as to a strike and what it means for students, I thought I’d write about some current news issues, with

a little bit of colour commentary.

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia says lawyers and judges aren’t capable of making moral choices any more than Joe Six- Pack. Also, Orgies are good. Source: Scalia joked “...sexual orgies eliminate tension and ought to be encouraged,” but said a panel of judges is not inherently qualified to determine the morality of such behavior.

He pointed to the granting of voting rights to women in 1920 through a constitutional amendment as the proper way Jor a democracy to fundamentally change its

laws.

Commentary: This is the coolest 70- year-old in the world. Although listening to anybody that old talk about orgies is almost enough for me

to never want to be in one. Almost.

Bush pushes for physical searches of homes and businesses of ‘suspected terrorists’ without any

legal checks or warrants.

Source: “President Bush authorized the National Security Agency to begin conducting electronic eavesdropping on terrorism suspects in the United States, including American citizens,

..the

lawyers talked with senior FBI officials

] 22 «¢

without court approval.

about using the same legal authority to conduct physical searches of homes and businesses of terrorism

suspects—also without court approval, one current and one former

government official tell U.S. News.”

Commentary: I have nothing funny to

add about this, as there is nothing

funny about it. Let me just say that I’m glad to be Canadian and if anyone needs me, P’ll be hiding in my closet, crying until my eyes hurt.

Canadian man held hostage in Israel treated well because he was

Canadian.

Source: “When they were certain I was

Canadian, they were very disappointed.

Then, they told me, ‘We love |.

Canada.’ That’ wonderful to hear when

you have guns pointed at you,” an exhausted

Mr. Budzanowski said yesterday in a telephone interview shortly after he was

released after almost 30 hours as a hostage.

Commentary: Well, even more reason for people traveling abroad to keep Canadian flags and such on them. Although god help you if they find out you're an American in disguise, they'll probably revoke your Tim Hortons rights (they have Tims in Israel, right? Right?).

How the hell did this work anyway? “You're Canadian? Do you know Jim?” “Uh yeah, I know Jim.” “Jim dated my cousin for a few years, he was a great guy! You're free to go, we love Canada!” “Uh. ..really? Ok. Bye!”

Isaac Hayes quits Southpark for being ‘insulting to religion’, irony and hilarity abound.

Source: Soul singer Isaac Hayes said Monday he was quitting his job as the voice of the lusty character “Chef” on the satiric cable TV cartoon “South Park,” citing the shows “inappropriate ridicule” of religion.

Commentary: Are you serious? I know this issue isn’t really that important, and it’s been rehashed in the but what the hell. It’s all well and good to make fun of religion,

media...

unless it’s your own? Hmm, does that

ever sound familiar.

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